OKTOBERFEST!

This weekend was a weekend for the ages. I'm talking a day that will never be fully remembered, but never be forgotten. Have you ever seen the movie Big Fish, where the dad tells his son seemingly tall tales, but they all turn out to be "true"? This weekend will be my tall tale. I am baffled by why more of the world doesn't have festivals like this. It isn't only about the beer, or even about the tradition or culture. It is something you truly have to experience to understand. Okay, enough propagandizing, here's the stories to go with it.

Day 1: Friday, Viernes, the Book of Genesis

Mark and I, being the responsible adults we are, decided going out on thursday would not be a smart idea before a weekend largely based around consuming alcohol. In retrospect, I was gonna come back with an empty tank regardless, so we probably could have. Live and learn...I'll sleep when I'm dead. This is our first journey to the Madrid airport, which is conveniently accessible by my favorite thing, the metro! It's actually not bad to the airport seeing as it's a nice train and doesnt cost 40 euros like a cab would, but it still lacks air conditioning. Aside: I have heard that the metro does not change temperature with the seasons, and in my summer clothes I struggle, and almost always fail, to stay dry...so pumped for a winter coat experience in that climate. Back to the program: We arrive at Madrid Barajas Airport...and the other terminals are pretty impressive just like T4 was. We took advantage of duty free and got a bottle of rum so our experience in Munich on friday night would be cheaper. More to come on that note. Lufthansa 4421, MAD to MUC, was a very enjoyable flight. The germans arent always friendly, but their in flight service is fantastic. With my 100 dollar ticket, I got a full hot meal, more legroom than I've ever had in coach, and free drinks of whatever I fancied. I love Southwest and all, but my flights to Dallas have to stop and all I get is peanuts and a sore back. Little nap....wake up feeling a little hungry, but its no problem because were....

wait for it...

München!

Munich airport is a shopping mall. It is just as cool as Madrid's. Why do they put so much money into their airports?? We walk through all of the airport-chic shopping and meet up with long lost Kinsey and Cam, and begin the next voyage to the hotel. The train takes us right there, so thats not an issue.

Things I learned on the train:

1. Cam's phone has a sheep on it. Like a tomagatchi with a touch screen.
2. Cam can read just fine. She can actually read every single station along our train line.
3. Cam can not read. A map. "Which stop is ours and what is the one before it?" Cam proceeds to read almost every single place we stop...except ours and the one before it. There were some texans (Texan count: 2) sitting across the aisle from us that we had been chatting with (they opened with a sarcasm laden "You guys are here for the museum tour too, right?" and we seemed to get along) and they decided to help her out.
4. Germany, when cloudy, is kind of depressing, but I was so excited that nothing could have bothered me.

We got to our hotel, pulled the old switcheroo and put 4 people in a reservation for 2. Got settled, I went on a mission because I forgot deodorant. Terrifying. Not only do I innately want to speak Spanish to everyone now, I speak no German but people seem to speak it to me. I finally found the only stick deodorant they had because all germans have a roll on deodorant fetish and headed back to begin our night. Begin our night means the 4 us sitting around drinking, each taking our turns saying "Alright, we should go now" right before the subject changes and we dont leave. Eventually we all decided that it was time to leave at the same time and actually left, and headed out on foot for Marienplatz. I've been to Munich once before, for 8 hours or so, so naturally I decided that I should navigate. I mean we had a map, so I would definitely go the right direction. Not exactly, but we ended up there eventually so no harm no foul. No one had seen Munich but me and Cam when she was a child so I figure I did everyone a favor...especially seeing as we walked by Hofbräuhaus and subconsciously realized how fun our night would end up being. We walked around some more, walked by the 2nd place Champions league trophy tent which unfortunately was closed, but I think soccer trophies are now following me so I'm bringin that mojo back to Amurrica. My secret goal of finding a Maus Straβe was a failure, so on to the next mission.

Time for dinner at ze Hofbräuhaus. We turned a corner and saw the mob trying to get into the place before we even realized it was where we wanted to go...but once again, we saw a VIP line, why not try? And once again, it worked. I'm hoping this luck doesnt run out, I'm getting used to it. We went in and headed up to the 3rd floor and quickly found a table. The third floor was so incredible. A big long beer hall, full of people, and boy were they rowdy. There was a live band too, and we were soon to learn that there were dancers ever 30 minutes or so too. Who says that the party people don't have culture?

 

We all ordered random german foods off of the menu, and of course, our first liters of beer. German beer is just too tasty to turn down, and we all thought we had walked off all of our rum...probably not true. We asked the people at the end of our table to take a picture, they turned out to be....Texans! (Texan count: 4) from Plano nonetheless. Small world. We finished our food and drinks and immersed ourselves in the song and dance more and more as the night went on. A friend, Meg, and a friend of a friend, Rosie, joined us, which only added to the jubilation. Singing led to cheersing, cheersing led to Gates covered in beer and our table covered in glass...thanks girls.

We took that as our cue to move somewhere else so we went outside to the garden/patio area. Meg and Rosie had already moved out and seemed to have made a friend, a man in his 40s, so I figured I should go sit with them...little did I know that man in his 40s was Italian and married...to another man. He took a particular liking to me which was uncomfortable, especially since his husband was sitting 1 table over. Meg came to the rescue and played the "Gates, tell him how we met" card which alleviated some of the awkwardness. Still, my first experience, and hopefully last, being hit on by a gay married Italian. Time to leave we decide....time travel back to the hotel to rest up for the big day to come.

Day 2: Saturday, Sabado, The Book of Revelations

The revelation is that Oktoberfest is the best thing ever, I'll get that out of the way right off the bat.

Now for how I came to that revelation. Wake up, early. Get ready for the day, put our mental drinking caps back on, and head out around 7:45.We had some friends who had already arrived and worked their way to the front of the line, thanks for that guys. Great friends honestly, got us a spot at the front of the line and greeted us with a tall can of Paulaner. This is our first time seeing each other since either summer or last year depending on the person, so yeah, were pumped. The Oktoberfest grounds is far more than "tents" on a fairgrounds. It includes the entire fairgrounds part too, and it is a permanent fixture, not seasonal by any means. I imagine it is pretty exciting for locals walking by in the weeks before the festival, knowing what awaits them. There was a ride called Wilde Maus too, which I didnt know was trying to tell me that Maus was in for a Wilde ride.

Our friends had chosen the Augustiner Brau tent, which we later learned is known for having the best beer and the friendliest tent, yet for some reason is not considered the "best" tent? I mean I went to Oktoberfest for beer and friends, what more could I need? Everything we had heard would turn out to be true. We got into the tent around 9....but they cant serve beer until 12 the first day because the mayor has to tap the first keg and cause a hoopla. However, we did manage to get a table, which is more or less unheard of the first weekend without a reservation. The beer gods are on our side. Whatever, it was worth the wait, and we were with our long lost amigos so it wasnt too bad. Finally, around 11:30, we started to hear some hoopla...it has begun. There was a parade, which we couldnt see because we didn't want to lose our table, but it sounded cool? The Augustiner flag/sign thing finally was brought into the tent, it was time to do some drinking. The whole modus operandi for these tents is perfect for what it is. A liter of beer at a time, and women who can carry 10-12 liters at a time. Quite a system. The first sip of this beer was completely euphoric, not only because of how long we had waited for it, but also because it was incredibly delicious. Smooth, not too light but not too heavy, and a little bit sweet. Augustiner has a special brew for Oktoberfest, so if you want to try it for yourself, you're gonna have to head to Munich. The house brass band plays a certain song every 10 minutes or so that is more or less a toast, and ends with 1 2 3 drink...so yeah, it's a toast.

List form is the best way to summarize the actual drinking part of the day, so here it goes:

1. 18 year old german at the table next to us stands up on his bench and chugs a liter. I dump my plans to drink for America and concede defeat. 
2. Drinking games involving cards, hands, everything but ping pong balls. Camaraderie and beer is a beautiful thing.
3. Most chaotic bathroom experience of my life. So many yelling germans, a lady who's job it was to direct traffic, and people standing at the urinal for about 5 minutes...not faking.
4. Certain someone (not me) decides to take a little nap, with a liter glass as his pillow. Beer: 1. Him: 0.
5. Memories are made and then very soon after forgotten.
6. Everyone leaves to go ride roller coasters, except me. They come back to find me at a table with 6 Germans, who were far more friendly towards me than they were to everyone who came back and wanted to sit back down haha. 

That sums up the day. At this point, its about 6. We made it back to the hotel, somehow, and managed to make reservations with the concierge for an italian restaurant? This is one of those forgotten memories, and we slept through the reservation. Except Cam, that is, she took it upon herself to go to said restaurant and get 2 pizzas and 2 things of pasta. Needless to say when I emerged from hibernation at 2 AM, I had quite the WTF moment with mystery italian food in our room. I am also pretty sure that instead of woodfiring the pizza, they used cigarettes, because thats what it tasted like. The pasta was a nice surprise though. We decided against rallying and going out, which was probably a sound decision, seeing as Sunday was quite a struggle anyway, certainly not the lords day.

Oktoberfest was incredible. It was without question one of the most fun weekends of my life, and everyone who has the means needs to experience it. It was that good

(Didn't use the word awesome in this post once Dad)